Meet Beth Bigler | Pet Loss Grief Counselor

We had the good fortune of connecting with Beth Bigler and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Beth, we’d love to hear more about your end-goal, professionally.
My end goal is to have achieved a cultural perspective shift on the human-animal bond and the impact of animal companion grief on guardians. I am on a passionate mission to normalize pet loss grief and transform the way companies, media, and individuals perceive and support the death of an animal companion.

In the future, I hope that when an animal companion receives a terminal diagnosis or dies, people will have tremendous support from their families, workplaces, and communities thanks to this shift I aim to achieve. Grieving guardians won’t have to wonder if they are ‘crazy,’ ‘weird,’ or ‘overreacting’ to their feelings. They know their feelings are valid and that I and many others “get it.” They don’t feel like they are all alone in their sorrow. They will know it’s okay to ask for and to receive help for their profound loss.

In addition to the support I will have provided to my one-on-one pet loss grief counseling clients and my Instagram community, I would like to be remembered as the world’s foremost expert, advocate, and educator for anticipatory and post-loss animal grief, having helped millions of pet loss grievers and animal care workers to feel validated, empowered, and resilient.

What should our readers know about your business?
I can’t remember a time in my life when companion animals didn’t matter to me.

From my first crimson Beta fish, Freddy, to my first mammal, Jordan the gerbil (named after my favorite New Kids On The Block crooner), to my first cat, Madonna (I’m sensing a naming theme here), to my first “adult” cats, Arnie and Zelda, my new kitten additions, Merwin and Lux, to the countless pups I have received slobbery kisses from, I have always appreciated the deep bond and profound love that exists between people and animals.

I have benefitted from the joy, acceptance, and unabashed friendship a companion animal brings and am grateful for all the gifts the animals in my life have brought me.

But, it was not in my plan to become a pet loss grief counselor!

I began a career as a writer before I was even out of high school, which led me to a successful career in the film, television, and theatre industry as a writer and producer. I spent the bulk of my professional career creating and selling reality TV shows. I figured I would always work in entertainment.

But, when my 11-year-old soulmate cat, Arnie, received a 30-day prognosis on a cancer diagnosis, my whole world stopped. I didn’t know what to do. Arnie was my heart, my soul, my rock, my anchor, and my ultimate protector. I couldn’t imagine living in a world without him. I wasn’t sure I even wanted to.

I immediately sought out pet loss grief support for myself, which profoundly aided in my ability to step up for Arnie during his sickness. It was lifesaving and transformative.

And, we tried chemotherapy for Arne – not sure it would work, but it did. We got a remission!

Shortly after our remission celebration I had the opportunity to help a stranger at the vet’s office who was faced with an unexpected euthanasia decision and I realized that I wanted to help others learn how to integrate a loss into their lives and empower them on their grief journey.

I just wasn’t sure how I would do it! I was deeply entrenched in my work in the entertainment industry and thought to myself, “maybe when I retire?”

Sadly, a year after Arnie’s first diagnosis, he died unexpectedly from a totally different cancer. It was devastating but I was so grateful for all the grief work I had done before to prepare. I knew then that I wanted to change my whole life to start helping others move through their own losses.

So, I uprooted my entire life, began intensive training, and eventually opened my private pet loss grief counseling practice, Honoring Our Animals and started my Instagram community, @honoringouranimals.

I specialize in both anticipatory and post-loss grief counseling for individuals, families, and couples who are experiencing grief about their animals.

Many people say to me, “it must be so depressing to hear about people’s sad animal stories all day.” They’re usually surprised to hear that I find my work absolutely fulfilling and hopeful. It’s true that I work with clients who are at some of their lowest moments in life, but it’s an absolute honor to hold space for people who are going through their loss.

I believe deeply in my clients’ abilities to use their own strengths and the gifts, guidance, lessons, and teachings of their beloved animals to help them as they move through their grief.

Many of my clients come to me specifically because my daily content resonates with them on Instagram or because they’ve been referred to me by a friend or veterinary professional.

One of the biggest things that resonates with my clients is the desire to continue honoring their relationship with their animal by celebrating and preserving their bond through ritual and connection. I love helping my clients find customized tools and strategies to make this a reality.

I also find much joy in helping clients release their guilty feelings around their loss and to help them feel validated in their grief. Pet loss grief is disenfranchised, which means it is not recognized by our culture as a significant loss. People still say things like “it’s just a dog” or “only a cat” and many grievers can feel minimized, isolated, and embarrassed for their grief. I hope that through education and advocacy, we can begin to shift our cultural conversations about the importance of the human-animal bond and can offer more support to grievers who are experiencing a loss.

I am also enthusiastic about my Instagram community! We have an amazing space for grievers to connect and share their experiences. Each month I hold a live pet memorial service where people can hear their names and their animal’s names honored. It is so wonderful to bring together fellow grievers and truly honor each of their animal’s amazing lives.

My dream for the future is that we don’t think of it as pet loss ‘grief.’ Now, we think of it as ‘pet loss.’ Because, we will eventually understand that the death of an animal companion is a complex and difficult emotional experience, not an event that we need to attach the word ‘grief’ to. We understand that pet loss, in and of itself, is valid grief experience that deserves to be supported and that there are a wealth of resources available to help navigate and support the journey.

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
I would like to shout out veterinary professionals! I spent most of my days working with grieving animal guardians and hear the most extraordinary stories of veterinary professionals who truly go above and beyond. And, in my own experience, the veterinary teams I’m lucky enough to know have been outstanding. The veterinary field is an extremely difficult profession and many workers struggle with high rates of anxiety, depression, and suicidality. I appreciate organizations like Not One More Vet and Not Another Vet Nurse who are working to empower mental wellbeing so professionals in this field can thrive. And, we can all do our part by being kind and supportive to the veterinarians in our lives!

Website: www.honoringouranimals.com

Instagram: @honoringouranimals