Meet Barb Kamlet | Psychotherapist and Executive Director of Shimmering Wings

We had the good fortune of connecting with Barb Kamlet and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Barb, can you walk us through the thought-process of starting your business?
When someone experiences the death of an important person in their life, the feelings of grief that go with that experience are incredibly invalidated and dismissed in our society. It’s not uncommon for the grieving person to be in conflict with themselves, feeling a host of emotions – sadness, anger, guilt, relief among others – and at the same time dealing with a culture that basically says to grievers, “Get over it!” “Forget.” “Move on!” “Take a three day bereavement leave and come back to work,” as if the death had no impact on the griever or if it did, to put that behind them.

I started my private practice, GriefJourney Counseling, with the strong belief that people people experiencing grief not only have a desire to share their stories and to have those stories heard and honored without judgment, but that telling their stories is a crucial part of the healing process.

Some people call their career path a calling and for me, being a grief therapist is just that. Understanding that people have a need to grieve in the midst of a society that often looks down on grief, I chose this field because I have the capacity to sit with a grieving individual, witness their pain and give them a safe and non-judgmental space to cry, vent, talk about guilt or relief or loneliness and to tell their story over and over again if that’s what they need to journey through their grief. In short, in a society that is grief adverse, I provide a safe and compassionate presence that tells my clients it’s ok to grieve and,it’s ok to talk about their person long after they are told by most people that it’s time to move on.

My passion to work with grieving adult clients very unexpectedly morphed into a passion to prove the same for grieving children. From that passion came Shimmering Wings, a non-profit organization that provides grief support and education to individuals who experienced a death loss when they were.a child.

Statistically, there is strong evidence that when a child has unsupported grief, there can be a high incidence of mental health issues, suicidal ideation, substance abuse, and incarceration among other life challenges when they become adults.. In 2014, Shimmering Wings became the Colorado partner for Camp Erin, a free overnight camp for grieving youth ages 6 to 17. Camp incorporates traditional camp activities with grief activities that give the campers an opportunity to have their voices heard, their feelings validated, their memories cherished, their ongoing lives supported with loving care and compassion. and most importantly, in being with kindred spirits who speak the same language and understand their grief in a way that adults can’t., the campers leave camp knowing they are not alone.

Shimmering Wings also has Next Page,an overnight education and support camp for grieving adult caregivers of grieving youth.

I am a co-founder and executive director of Shimmering Wings and the Director of Camp Erin Denver and Next Page.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?
I was asked recently what gets me out of bed in the morning. I’m passionate about the work I do and without question, that’s what gets me out of bed every day. We live in such a grief adverse society. Terms like “move on,” “forget,” and “get over it” have become commonplace. For those who have experienced a life defining loss, the concept of “moving on” or “getting over it” often forces them into wearing a mask of sorts that says to people, “I’m ok,” when clearly they are not and that creates a situation when the griever starts butting heads with themselves because what they are feeling inside is counter to the messages they get about how to cope with their loss. It’s not at all uncommon that the griever’s support people go back to their own lives and the support dwindles as friends tire of seeing the emotions and hearing the repetitive stories of the grief that is being carried. I call myself a story listener. In the introduction on my website, I wrote, “I believe that each of us has a story to tell and that our stories often have a sense of loss within them. Sometimes it’s a sense of losing someone or something outside of us and sometimes it’s a sense of losing ourselves and with that, our core beliefs and values. In a society that all too frequently says “forget,” “get over it,” or “you need to move on,” I strongly believe that we not only have a desire to share our stories and to have our stories heard and honored without judgment, but that telling our stories is a crucial part of the healing process.
What gets me up in the morning is that I have the capacity to hold space for my clients, to show up, be fully present without judgment and to sit with them during some of the most difficult times of their life. Within that space, I witness tears and deep pain and sometimes I hear my clients share something that they’ve carried most of their lives and never shared with another human being.

If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
Some of where we would go depends on the friend’s interest. I would definitely want to take them to High Tea at the Brown Palace. Sightseeing wise – Botanic Gardens, Red Rocks and/or Garden of the Gods, Pearl Street Mall, Frisco (where I spent many summers at my grandparents’ cabin), Breckenridge/Vail. Time permitting, the Sand Dunes

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
I’m grateful to my mentor, Dr. Annamarie Fidel-Rice, who has been a strong support, cheer leader and role model in my work with grieving individuals, I am likewise grateful for my private practice clients who have the courage to open themselves up to some difficult thoughts and feelings and who trust that I will provide a safe space for their grief journey.

Website: GriefJourneyCounseling.com

Other: griefjourneycounseling@gmail.com