Meet Deb Rubin | Psychotherapist, Parent Coach, Group Facilitator

We had the good fortune of connecting with Deb Rubin and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Deb, how does your business help the community?
Mother-daughter relationships are complex, diverse and beautiful. However, we live in a world where cultural messaging is strong and impactful and that messaging around mothers and daughters is toxic and scary. I believe that we can change the story that these relationships have to be painful and disconnected by leaning into the challenges and evolving as women. My workshops are designed to strengthen mother-daughter relationships (and those who identify or are socialized as daughters) through the adolescent years. My goal is to equip moms with the necessary tools and compassion to (re)discover their daughters and navigate their unique paths forward. When moms establish a solid and authentic connection they can be confident that their relationship can withstand these inevitable turbulent periods. If moms are empowered to change their stance with their daughters, learn to really listen and mirror their experiences, the potential for our adolescent girls for healthy self awareness, critical thinking and increased confidence is very high. In a safe and loving Mom/Daughter duo the ripple effect is profound. I am passionate about holding space for education, lending strategies and empowering others to change the nature of connection in our community.

Can you give our readers an introduction to your business? Maybe you can share a bit about what you do and what sets you apart from others?
I am a Licensed Clinical Social Worker residing in Boulder, Colorado with my husband and two daughters. I have worked with adults and adolescents for 20+ years in numerous therapeutic job settings as well as sexual health education. My academic and professional training blends the best in Eastern and Western theory and therapeutic practice.

My widespread path of service has allowed me to work with people in a variety of settings including; Colorado Outward Bound School and Women’s Wilderness Institute, Planned Parenthood, U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs Hospital, Colorado University’s Psychological and Psychiatry Department and eventually landing in my private therapeutic practice in 2006. Many people told me I was too young to start a private practice, but I was determined.

For about 10 years I was mostly focused on couples and although I love working with couples I realized that what I am most excited about it CONNECTION. How we connect, why we connect, what get’s in the way of deep connection. I realized that I could apply my skills with any type of connection. That is when I became intrigued (some might say obsessed) by the Mother/Daughter connection. Not only was I living it, I wanted to support others in this quest. I was determined to change the old stories about how scary adolescence are and how terrible those years have to be as a parent. Don’t get me wrong, I do not think these years are peaches and rainbows, but I do think we have the power to increase our insight which enhances our instincts and invites curiosity and compassion.

In 2017 I expanded my practice to also include parent coaching and group facilitation through my newest baby, “The Mother Daughter Journey” (MDJ). The MDJ offers a variety of workshops designed to equip moms with the necessary strategies, compassion and perspective in order to embrace and discover their daughters (and those who identify and are socialized as daughter) and deepen connection.

As I moved into the group world, while still holding a full private practice, I am developing new muscles. These muscles include marketing and more exposure. I have always had a pretty low profile career living within the limits of my office. But now I have something important to say to the world and so much conviction on getting that message out. That message is, Moms, our daughters need us now more than ever, they just need us in a different way. It is up to us to learn how to change our stance to show up differently, while still being true to ourselves. In this change we can impact our girls that will effect their future relationships and the ripple continues.

I am someone that learns through experience and I am learning a lot right now. Taking chances and speaking from my heart, while trying to quiet the noise of the world is my deepest work right now. But when I actually just speak from my heart and listen to my intuition, all the answers are there.

If you had a friend visiting you, what are some of the local spots you’d want to take them around to?
Okay, this is from the Boulder perspective. The day would have to start at Beleza Coffee. Get your drink and hang out for a while because you get a real flavor of the Boulder local scene. I personally love their Matcha Latte. Then I would take them on a great hike; probably Shannahan Ridge. Then get on our bikes and cruise down town to park and walk Pearl Street. I would check out some of the art galleries like Art & Soul and SmithKlein Gallery. There are also great street performers where you look. When the hunger starts to kick in there are a handful of yummy restaurants but a few places that stand out for me are The Kitchen or Centro. Both allow outside seating right on Pearl street with good people watching. From there I might head down to Boulder Creek and depending on the weather just chill by the creek for a while. Then it’s time for happy hour where I would either go to Jax for oysters and oyster shooters and sit outside or The Kitchen Upstairs where you can sit by the fire and have an amazing martini. Lastly, end the day with either a dinner at Oak or a picnic at Chataqua or up Flagstaff Mountain where their are plenty of lookout spots to watch the sunset.

Who else deserves some credit and recognition?
Huge shout outs to my mentors; Eliza & Sil Reynolds who wrote Mothering & Daughtering. Of course Lisa Demour; I have read her books and blogs and just soak up everything I can learn from her. Gordon Neufeld whom I follow and read and adore.

My daughters! Sage & Tess Rubin for being my biggest teachers of all time. My mother, Lois Baron who mothered me with a full heart. I feel like I won the mom lottery with her. My husband, Howie Rubin who is always supporting whatever passion project I have going on.

Sorry if that’s too much 🙂

Website: https://motherdaughterjourney.co/

Instagram: themotherdaughterjourney

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/public-profile/settings?trk=d_flagship3_profile_self_view_public_profile

Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@motherhooduncutpodcast6689

Other: Motherhood Uncut Podcast