Meet Lila Low-Beinart | Neurodiversity-Affirming Autistic Therapist & Trainer

We had the good fortune of connecting with Lila Low-Beinart and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Lila, how has your perspective on work-life balance evolved over time?
As an autistic therapist in Boulder, CO, I’ve had to work hard at creating the work-life balance that works for me. The message I have continually received from the culture I grew up in (white, neurotypical, upper-middle class, and capitalist) is that I need to accomplish certain things, and thus work very hard, in order to live a “successful” life. However, as a neurodivergent human, I have never been able to fit into that “normal” box (although I don’t believe anyone truly fits into the box of “normal”). The neurodiversity paradigm states that just as biological diversity is necessary for thriving animal ecosystems, human neurological diversity is necessary for thriving human ecosystems. When everyone is expected to work a certain number of hours per week, no matter their unique needs, the potential for neurological diversity to add substance and depth to our civilization is damaged.
My own relationship with work-life balance has changed many times. First, as a chemist I worked forty hours a week, about seventy-five percent by myself and twenty-five percent with other people. This ratio worked really well for me – I spent about ten hours a week interacting with people, and thirty hours deeply engaging my mind and body. Now, as a therapist, my primary role is to interact with people, and I’ve found about twelve to fourteen hours a week is my max.
Many therapists see twenty, thirty or even forty clients a week (often due to the low reimbursement rates by insurance companies, a big topic for another time). Seeing this number of clients would quickly lead me to burn-out. Because of my sensitivity (I am also highly sensitive and gifted), I experience sensations much more deeply than most people. This adds incredible depth to my life and is one of my superpowers as a neurodivergent therapist. And, it means I have less energy than many people do. Seeing twelve to fourteen clients a week allows me to care for myself as my energy levels shift, and in turn provide a radical experience of being seen, heard, and validated that some of my clients have rarely experienced before.
Because I continually receive messages from society to work harder and “achieve” more, self-validating the way I do work-life balance is an uphill battle. One way I do this is by surrounding myself with people who look at work-life balance the way I do, as something that serves us rather than serves capitalism. Another way I do this is by dropping the concept of work-life balance altogether, instead looking at what my needs, values, and priorities are at any given moment, and over time. I can meet these needs, values, and priorities both in my “work” and in my “life.” For example, one of my needs and values is fun, which I can meet through spending time with my friends or through creating a training on neurodiversity affirming therapy.
Being an autistic therapist, I need to continually remind myself of the neurodiversity paradigm in order to drop the messages that my achievements and hours I work need to look like anyone else’s. My deep sensitivity allows me to show up for clients in a unique and powerful way, and guarding this gift as well as my energy actually makes me a better therapist. Moving beyond the traditional notion of work-life balance altogether, I’ve crafted a life that reflects my needs, values, and priorities, allowing me to honor my fluctuating energy levels and work fifteen to thirty hours a week. (I want to name the many privileges, including generational wealth and my white body, that have greatly aided my ability to create this life.) I continually strive to step outside the “box of normal” and live my most authentic, compassionate, and impactful life.

Alright, so for those in our community who might not be familiar with your business, can you tell us more?

At Divergent Paths Counseling I am proud to offer neurodiversity affirming therapy to adults and teens. I specialize in working with women, genderqueer, and trans folxs, historically mis-diagnosed and therefore mis-treated neurodivergent people. I am LGBTQIA+-affirming, ENM-affirming, sex-positive, anti-ableist, anti-racist, and culturally sensitive.

I believe one of my gifts is truly seeing people who have historically felt deeply misunderstood by their families, society, or both. My deep sensitivity allows me to ‘get’ the person underneath their mask or trauma and work together to heal the trauma of being unseen, unsupported, and marginalized. People I work with often report feeling deeply seen and validated, sometimes for the first time in their lives.

Divergent Paths Counseling offers neurodiversity affirming therapy to individuals, groups, and relationships/couples. We also offer support to parents of neurodivergent teens and adults, as well as neurodiversity affirming trainings for mental health practitioners. If you’re interested in learning more, please reach out for a free 20 minute consult!

Any places to eat or things to do that you can share with our readers? If they have a friend visiting town, what are some spots they could take them to?
While I work as a neurodivergent therapist in Boulder, CO, I live in Lafayette and have really fallen in love with the charming locally owned businesses and easily accessible nature. I absolutely love Teocalli – a completely gluten free Mexican restaurant with amazing tacos (and gluten free churros!). Walking along the Coal Creek trail always leaves me feeling refreshed and more connected to myself and nature. The Ethiopian food at Ras Kassa’s is delicious and I really enjoy their decor. And I am a sucker for cute coffee shops, and Brew Due South is about as cute as you can get (think lots of luscious plants, delicious and creative drinks, and a sweet and eclectic clothing shop attached!)

The Shoutout series is all about recognizing that our success and where we are in life is at least somewhat thanks to the efforts, support, mentorship, love and encouragement of others. So is there someone that you want to dedicate your shoutout to?
My journey as a private practice owner and therapist in Boulder, CO would not have been nearly as smooth, or carried out with nearly as much self-compassion, without the help of my supervisor, David Meer. As a fellow neurodivergent therapist, he offered me neurodiversity affirming supervision that celebrated, rather than penalized, my sensitivity. He validated the unique ways I worked as an autistic therapist, encouraging me to create a private practice that was sustainable for me, not a practice that looked like what I was “supposed” to do. He walked alongside me as I learned how to offer radically affirming therapy for autistic, ADHDers, gifted, and highly sensitive people, and began offering neurodiversity affirming trainings. As a group practice owner himself, he also taught me everything I needed to start my private practice, Divergent Paths Counseling, and had unshakeable faith in my capacity to run my own business. Thank you David for your guidance, mentorship, and commitment to neurodiversity affirming care.

Website: https://www.divergentpathscounseling.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/divergent.paths.counseling/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/lila-low-beinart-48469658/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61550613715017

Image Credits
Bridgett Winters MA Lila Low-Beinart MA