Meet Dr. Jennifer Smith | Speaker, Writer, Coach & Book Nerd

We had the good fortune of connecting with Dr. Jennifer Smith and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Dr. Jennifer, we’d love to hear about how you approach risk and risk-taking

Risk has been a constant companion in my life. Sometimes, it chose me, and sometimes, I chose it. But it became so present that I decided to embrace it wholeheartedly. My professional and personal motto is to “live dangerously, be you.” As a professional, it looks a little different than it does in my personal life.

This phrase came to me when I worked with a business coach over a decade ago. We explored the focus of my young life coaching business, and I explained how I wanted people to feel free to be who they were. Being authentic in a world of systems that ask us to be the same can feel dangerous. It can feel dangerously decadent to do it anyway. And it can feel dangerously healthy to embrace it. That day, the Dangerous Leader Model began to take shape; a book called “The Art of Living Dangerously: A Rebels Guide to Thriving in a World that Expects You to Conform” followed, but it matured years later in my doctoral work on executive leadership.

The evolution of my risk profile is rooted in my upbringing. I was the oldest in my family, and I helped raise my siblings while my parents worked. Due to circumstances and the impatience I was born with, I grew up young. I was ready to live a bigger life at a very young age. I am from a very small town in California and grew up without a lot of material wealth—well, without any material wealth.

I became hungry for more and went after it when it showed up. This led me to say yes to a full college scholarship from the US Army and start a career as a military officer. The Army taught me how to channel my energy into worthy challenges. By that point, I had already taken risks that were not worth it with alcohol, men, money, and reputation. I began to learn what healthy risks were.

That came at its own cost. By age 27, I was a divorced alcoholic with an equally strong addiction to work and anything that felt good. I also wanted to learn from all of these risks I had taken and kept asking questions. The questions made me take the ultimate risk of embracing who I really was and being willing to begin the journey to living as that energy.

I built the life I thought success meant: got sober, a six-figure job, a white picket fence in the suburbs, an SUV in the garage, a husband with his own kids, had a son together, community volunteer, and more. All the risk I took to achieve that success made me miserable. It was time for another risk.

I divorced the man with different life goals, opened my first business, became a life coach, and began writing. That was when the risk became real fuel for life. That was when I felt and embraced the danger of being me.

That led me to become a college professor, attain my doctoral degree in executive leadership, join organizations to expand my experiences and discover that the core focus of my work was simply to help others be the best possible version of themselves and let go of whatever blocked them from that. As I lived the risks, others who craved this same sense of freedom became friends, lovers, and clients.

Today, I serve clients one-on-one and through my speaking and writing. I guide them through the risky process of building a relationship with the version of themselves they want to explore through my practice, The Dangerous Leader Group.

The risk I took with love was different. When I fell in love with him at the sound of his voice the first time I heard it, my husband was 11 years younger, lived across the US from me, and was an active-duty special operations soldier. Everything about the situation felt dangerous to me—but in the most delicious way.

His voice felt like home to me. When I met him in person for the first time and felt his touch, it was like the plates of the earth sliding into place below me. I was suddenly on solid footing.

We were both twice divorced and pretty dead set on not getting married. I kept my residence in Iowa with my son, whom I would never leave. He stayed in Georgia, stationed there for the first almost year of our relationship. We confronted the risk of a long-distance relationship with clear communication, expectations, and a lot of travel on my part. As an active-duty service member, it was harder for him to get away, and my job was flexible.

We navigated his move to Texas to begin his medical retirement board process. A few months later, decided we were worth the risk of a third marriage—maybe the old saying would be true. By September 2022, we were married.

My husband dealt with complex PTSD and other combat-related impacts. The book “Operator Syndrome” by Dr. Chris Freuh, is a description of the battle my husband fought every day for his health. In August, he spent 30 days in an inpatient treatment facility because he told me he was going to kill himself. Not a risk I was willing to take.

When he came out, he wanted to marry immediately and spend his life loving me, and I wanted to love him through whatever we faced in his life. It wasn’t a hard decision to take the risk. It was harder to bear the risks that came next.

In May of 2023, my husband of less than one year died of hypertensive and atherosclerotic cardiovascular disease. That is what the death certificate says. But it’s not a difficult leap to the reality that the impacts of mental and physical health he battled, ultimately won the war. And the biggest risk was realized. I lost my human.

Love is a risk. Sometimes, the energy fades, sometimes it is drowned in toxic behavior, and sometimes, the one holding ours dies in their sleep. Ours was not an easy marriage, but we kept moving forward because of the love we dedicated to each other. It was risky to love him for so many reasons. I thought marrying a man eleven years younger would significantly reduce the risk of becoming a widow. It most definitely did not.

Despite the realized risk, I would do it all over again—to love someone the way I loved him, to feel as loved as I did by him, to walk that risky path infinitely because that love was worth it. One day I hope to meet love again and take the risk of stepping into it. I refuse to let the risk of another round of pain limit me from possibility.

Risk Makes You Authentic

It is through risk that we get to know ourselves better. When we challenge what we think we know, we are taking a risk. When we act on new information, we are taking a risk. When we look at something from a new direction, we are taking a risk. Risk is everywhere in our lives.

Have ever felt more alive than when your heart is racing with excitement or when your stomach is full of butterflies as you wait for the good thing? In those moments of anticipation, there is risk. Being human is a risk.

It matters how we handle risk. And the more you know yourself, the better you can handle the risk. That is why I do the work I do. Connecting people to the idea of themselves they want to explore allows them to step into that new energy very deliberately to see how it feels. It is an experiment in thinking and living designed to test your best fit until you find it. It’s risky, but I think we are all worth it.

Live Dangerously, Be You.

What should our readers know about your business?

The Dangerous Leader Group results from many hours of deep reflective searching for who exactly I am and what I am supposed to be doing in this lifetime. The answer we all seek, right? More than a few missteps in trying to solve problems or get cute with services and programs revealed the inauthenticity of the marketing trends plaguing the coaching field. Today, the Dangerous Leader Group sits on the foundation of doctoral research, lived experience, and the continuing implementation of new ideas that tell us we are constantly evolving based on our lives.

A dangerous leader has embraced the ‘more’ awaiting them in life. They have shed the mantle of expectation and chosen to thrive instead of simply surviving. A dangerous leader develops a clear intention about the life they want to live, and they align all of their energies toward creating it.

I have, fortunately or unfortunately depending on your persepctive, lived the reality of shifting from a life of expectation to a life of feeling free to live exactly as she is. A simple idea that seems so complicated without a support system.

The Dangerous Leader Group is here to help you establish your intention, see past the obstacles that inevitably accompany change, and offer resources and tools to help you thrive as an individual, executive, or organization.

Any places to eat or things to do that you can share with our readers? If they have a friend visiting town, what are some spots they could take them to?
If my best friend was coming to Cedar Rapids, IA, I would take them to our local dog park because the dogs are the ones they really come to visit. After that, we would head to LP Street Food, where they have the best tacos, a non-alcoholic beer selection, and a super cool vibe. It would be a shame to miss the live music scene in this town, which is surprisingly eclectic for a midwestern vibe.

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
I dedicate this shout-out to Cat Running Elk, who has been my coach, mentor, and friend through some of the riskiest moments of my life.

Website: dangerousleader.com

Instagram: instagram.com @dangerousleadergroup and @dr.jennsmith

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifermsmith11/