Meet Beth Erlander

We had the good fortune of connecting with Beth Erlander and we’ve shared our conversation below.

Hi Beth, where are your from? We’d love to hear about how your background has played a role in who you are today?
The question-where are you from could be taken in a few ways. First thought-I’m from Colorado, yet was born in Southern California. I moved to Colorado when I was 3 so I consider myself a native Coloradoan. But I also go larger with that question-my ancestral roots come from Northern Europe, specifically Sweden and Germany. My German ancestors were from Russia-they emigrated during Katherine the Great’s rule back in the 18th century. They were some of the most perseverant people I know and I feel that within my own bones.

My parents have informed who I am greatly. My father is a Lutheran minister and I find myself following in his footsteps as I am leading more grief rituals and ceremonies these days. While I do not actively practice within the Lutheran church, I am bringing in the spiritual more and more to the grief work I do.

My mother is a nurse, and while I never wanted to be one because I couldn’t deal with blood, I have come to have a deep sense of compassion for the suffering of others. I tend to people’s inner wounds from grief and trauma. Ironically though, I do have to wear a nurse’s hat every once in a while when I care for my life partner who has quadriplegia from a mountain biking accident in 2012.

I would also like to add that the sacred land I grew up on-in Colorado Springs, Colorado under the foot of Mt Tava (Pikes Peak), has given me an appreciation and connection with the land. I practice animism and believe that everything has a sense of being within it. Thus, I have a deep connection with the Earth and hold her with sacred reverence. Everything I have is because of her. .

What should our readers know about your business?
I’m a licensed professional counselor in the state of Colorado and I’m also a grief coach. I mainly teach people that grief is more than death loss. My path to where am I now wasn’t easy and I didn’t choose it, rather, it chose me.

In 2012, I wanted to focus my private practice on working with families and children and I even had plans of having my own family. Then my life partner suffered a mountain biking accident with the result being quadriplegia or paralysis from the chest down. Our life literally went upside down. It was during his long stay at the hospital and his recovery at a rehab center where I heard my inner voice say-“Pay attention to all this, it is going to come in handy some day.”

The result of this process led me to focusing on grief. I persevered through so much loss and grief and found my way up and out so I could help others through any kind of sudden loss or life transition. I was in awe of my own resilience.

I would like people to know that grief can be a teacher. My tag-line is Grief Friend because I found that what I had to do was befriend grief-invite it in for tea and cookies and get to know it well. Grief doesn’t go away, it evolves with you over time. And if you let it in, it has many teachings for you.

I have learned so many lessons along the way. I wrote a memoir called “Life Upside Down: The Fall That Transformed Our Lives, Lifting Me Through Grief, Love and Quadriplegia.” It has been called an unofficial guidebook to grief and a romance that reads like a thriller. I would love more people to read it as it also teaches you how to be with your loved ones who are grieving.

My main passion in life is to help others to do grief better. Grief is a normal process of responding to your losses in life. And if we embrace it and know how to be with it, then it gives much more depth and meaning to our lives.

I am currently doing more online speaking events. My next one is on October 30, 2024 at 6:30pm. I will be speaking about how to navigate the global sorrows and grief with grace. There is so much to grieve right now ecologically, economically, politically along with our own personal grief.

I am open to public speaking engagements as well. I am also interested in helping businesses and corporations handle grief better. I provided a grief group to an organization who lost their co-worker to suicide.

Please reach out if you need my services. Thanks! Grieve well, be well.

Any places to eat or things to do that you can share with our readers? If they have a friend visiting town, what are some spots they could take them to?
Well, it depends on the time of year and the weather. Most of my friends would want to get out of the city. So I would probably take them to the mountains-head up to Nederland and go to Brainard Lake where we could hike and enjoy the accessibility of that place if my partner would join us. We can easily walk with him in his power wheel chair around the lake. Then we could go for a bite to eat at Crosscut Pizzeria where we could enjoy their unique homemade crusts. Or we could head back down to Boulder and go to Santos for ribs and tacos. And if it’s sunny, we’d probably spend most of our time on our front porch with my rose bush and morning glories. We may also head to Buckingham park where we could dip in the river and lay in the sun on the rocks. If they wanted to hear live music, we could check out a concert at the Chautauqua venue. Oh and then we could walk the Mesa Trail near there and get away from the busyness of the city.

Shoutout is all about shouting out others who you feel deserve additional recognition and exposure. Who would you like to shoutout?
I would love to recognize my grief mentors and teachers. I was taught how to grieve and hold grief rituals for others by two amazing humans from the Dagara tribe from West Africa-Elder Malidoma Patrice Somé and Sobonfu Somé. I attended the grief ritual led by Sobonfu shortly after my partner’s mountain biking accident. She taught me how to be with the immensity of my grief. And then I learned so much from Elder Malidoma as well and even studied with him to become a Cowry Shell Diviner. Their indigenous wisdom lit up my own experience of my life purpose-to help others grieve. Both Sobonfu and Malidoma are in the ancestor realm now, so I continue to grieve for them.

I also want to shout out to my grief mentor, Francis Weller. His beautiful book, The Wild Edge of Sorrow, helped me greatly with my grief. His book is the one I recommend the most because it expands the idea of grief beyond that of death loss. There is so much to grieve in one’s lifetime.

Website: https://betherlander.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beth_erlander_grief_friend/

Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/beth-erlander-103bb227/

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BethErlanderGriefFriend/

Other: https://crowflowpublications.com/ https://www.eventbrite.com/e/1049804131417?aff=oddtdtcreator 

Image Credits
Most photos are mine. The one of me and my partner at my book reading was taken by a friend. And the one where I am holding my heart in my hand was taken by the amazing photographer-Edica Pacha.